Calgary, July 2022
We live in a strange world. The climate change is causing calamities in many countries, but the restrictions limiting the pollution are being removed. There is an epidemy of gun violence, but people are allowed to carry concealed weapons. COVID pandemics killed millions of people, but there is a strong opposition to the vaccinations. There is a war in a place where wars are not supposed to happen. Therefore, it is not too far-fetched to imagine a country where the Leader declared the metric system of measurements unpatriotic and demanded to replace it by the old imperial units. After all, the Empire was build using those units. Therefore, to please the Leader, the parliament of the country passed the law making the metric system illegal. It caused some minor inconveniences like changing all the road signs from kilometers to miles, gas stations had to sell gas in gallons (British or American? The law didn’t say) and the food industry had to change the labels from kilograms to pounds. But the Leader thought it was worth it.
Unfortunately, it was not the end of the problems. There were some unexpected side-effects of the new law, as the owner of a luxury car dealership, John, have discovered. His customers were rich people who liked to show off their wealth, and John have been importing European cars for them. But those cars use metric components. Before the new law took effect, John simply had two sets of tools: metric and imperial. But now the metric system was abolished, and metric tools became illegal. Therefore, the police raided John’s workshop and confiscated his toolbox.
“How am I supposed to maintain my customer’s cars?” yelled John at the policeman.
“I don’t know, it’s not my problem,” answered the man. Then he loaded John’s tools on the police truck and left.
As expected, John found himself in an impossible situation. When one of his best customers, Martin, brought a beautiful Lamborghini for repair, John didn’t know what to do.
“I am very sorry Martin, but I cannot fix it. The police took my tools.”
“They took your tools? Why?”
“They say that metric tools are illegal.”
“But when I bought the car, you signed a contract to maintain it.”
“Yes, but at that time I didn’t know there will be a new law abolishing the metric system.”
“Are you saying I can’t get my car maintained?”
“Looks that way. At least not in this country.”
“You know John, I can sue you for a breach of contract.”
“Do whatever you want. Without the tools I can’t do anything.”
It didn’t take long before Martin’s lawyer appeared in John’s dealership.
“Martin wants to sue you for a breach of contract. How do you respond?”
“I cannot fulfill the contract because of the new law.”
“I am aware of it. Both of you have a valid point, and if Martin insists on suing, it can take years to resolve it. However, there is a better alternative.”
“What alternative?”
“I know the police who confiscated your tools, and I am sure we can come to some kind of agreement. It wouldn’t be cheap, but it will allow you to continue with your business.”
“How much will the bribe cost me?”
“I don’t know, I will have to negotiate it. But the policeman knows that if he asks too much, you will get bankrupt and that wouldn’t be good for anybody. Leave the negotiations up to me.”
Sure enough, in a few days the lawyer returned to John’s dealership, told him the price, John paid it, and the next day the tools appeared in his workshop. From then on Juan increased his service charges and Martin passed the new cost to his customers. In fact, both made money on the deal. Also, the bribe was equally divided between the policeman and the lawyer, and everybody was happy. They all had a reason to make a toast to the Leader.