Calgary, February 2023
Mary didn’t like men; they didn’t attract her. She didn’t like women either. She didn’t feel any need for a romantic love and didn’t understand why it is so important for so many people. But Mary did like children. She would go to playgrounds and watch them running round, climbing up and down, yelling and laughing. She wanted to have children of her own, but that couldn’t be done without a man. Adoption might be an option, but Mary wanted to have her own children. Having sex with a man didn’t feel repulsive to her but she couldn’t love him, and that gave her an idea: How about to find a gay man who needed to cover up his sexuality, coax him to have sex with her and pose as his girlfriend. That would satisfy both of their objectives.
Finding such a man turned out to be easy. There are many computer applications for the gay people, so Mary created an account on one of them, Grindr, and posted the following message: “Woman (and she wrote her name and age) is looking for a gay man for friendship.” She got several replies and selected Roger as the most likely candidate.
“Hello Roger, nice to see you,” she said when they met in a cafeteria close to her residence.
“Hello Mary, I read your message. Tell me. Why do you want to associate with a gay man?”
“I am an asexual woman; I don’t feel attraction to men or women. A friendship with a straight person would sooner or later create tension. Women would ask why there is no man in my life and men will try to get me to bed. With you there is no such danger. Now tell me about yourself. Why did you answer my message?”
”I am a politician and if my homosexuality becomes public, this will be the end of my career. I need a woman to be seen with.”
This arrangement was convenient for both of them. Roger took her to various parties and in the political circuits people started gossiping about him and his new girlfriend. Then one day Mary invited Roger to her apartment.
“Roger,” she said. “I wasn’t totally honest when I asked you to be my friend.”
“Really? Why?”
“I want to have sex with you.”
“You said you are asexual, not attracted to men.”
“That is true, and I am not in love with you. But I want to have a child and for that I need a man. A man like you who will not make any emotional demands on me.”
“I had sex with women, and I didn’t like it.”
“I am not asking you to like it. I want you to make me pregnant.”
“And then to pay the alimony.”
“No. I will never make any financial demands on you. I want to be a true single mother.”
Roger had to think about it. He also liked children but knew he couldn’t be a real husband in a traditional family, so he never expected to have them. But now, when Mary mentioned it, he could be a father. Mary was now his official girlfriend and if she becomes pregnant, it will discredit any rumours about him being gay. But Roger was gay, and he needed a love of a man. So far, he convinced his partner that Mary was only a coverup for his homosexuality but making her pregnant would look more than just a coverup. Jealousy could become a real problem.
“Sorry Mary, I must talk to my partner. I don’t want to lose him.”
“You need his love so much?”
“Yes, I do,” and Roger left.
The meeting between Roger and his partner Alex was somewhat tense.
“Alex, I have something important to tell you,” begun the conversation Roger.
“Is it about Mary?”
“Yes. She wants to have sex with me to get pregnant.”
“And then she will marry you. Is this your way to say goodbye to me?”
“No, not at all. I don’t want to lose you.”
“So, you will be Mary’s husband and occasionally sneak out with me in secret. Is that it?”
“No. I am not going to marry her, and I don’t want to hide what I am any longer. I will admit being gay, I will come out.”
Alex was surprised. “Wouldn’t it destroy your career?”
“I don’t know. The attitudes towards homosexuality are changing, but who knows how much. But as I said, I am tired of keeping it secret.”
“And if you do have a child with Mary, how will you combine it with us being together?”
“I will be the father of her child and also your partner, for the whole world to see.”
Alex was impressed. He never kept his sexual orientation secret, but for Roger it was a different story. “I wish you luck, you will need it.”
The discussion with Mary wasn’t much different.
“So, did you talk to your partner?” she asked when he came to see her.
Yes, I did, and I told him what you want.”
“And?”
“I will have sex with you and will be a father of your child.”
“This is marvellous. Can we start right now?”
They did, Roger didn’t particularly like it, but it worked. When they finished Mary asked:
“What made you to decide?”
“I have enough of secrecy, I will come out. I will be the father of your child and a lover of Alex.”
“Wouldn’t it destroy your career?”
“I don’t know, but I will no longer hide what I am.”
“So, you are willing to risk your career for a love of a man?”
“Yes.”
Mary was wandering about the power of romantic love. It seemed to be so important to so many people, but all it brought them were problems.