Calgary, May 2024
Brian was a talented young man. He was especially good at two things: climbing mountains and being popular with women. Brian was also a lucky man. His job as a Phys. ed. teacher gave him time to engage in his first talent, and the generally female world of the school was favourable to his second interest. Brian had no reason to complain. But when everything goes well, something always happens, and for him, it happened during his climbing holiday in the faraway mountains.
Brian was a good climber, and every summer he and his friends climbed the peaks of their land, but one summer they thought about something else. They decided to go to the big mountains abroad, to enjoy real mountaineering, and that’s when it happened. Brian met a woman of his life. Anita was the daughter of the owners of the hotel where they were staying, and it was love at first sight. She was an English teacher at the local school, but mostly she worked as a waitress in the hotel, and she didn’t like it. She didn’t want to spend her life as a helper for her parents. Therefore, when she saw Brian’s dreamy eyes, it opened the possibility of escaping. But it is not to say she would just utilize him. Brian was a nice guy, and Anita could easily see herself falling in love with him. The attraction was mutual, and it brought Brian some additional benefits. “You want more coffee?" she would ask him during breakfast, mostly ignoring the others. Then, when he and his friends returned from a climb, his dinner was always a bit better than what the others got. But his friends didn’t complain, they knew what was going on. They were good friends. Then, the evening before returning home, Brian waited for Anita to finish her work, took her in his arms and whispered: “I love you and I will come back for you.” Anita wasn’t resisting him; she wasn’t resisting him at all.
Brian fulfilled his promise. They exchanged a few love letters, Anita applied for a passport and visa, and then Brian returned to take her to his home. Losing their daughter was hard for her parents, but they loved Anita and wished her the best. “I will be visiting you,” she promised. Then they were in Brian’s country and their new life began. Anita wanted to upgrade her teacher’s certificate and spent most of the time studying. During the weekends Brian took her for little trips and his climbing activity was reduced drastically. “Our friend Brian is another victim of the wife’s syndrome,” his friends laughed, but technically they were wrong. Anita and Brian were not yet married. That took a little longer, and their wedding was modest. Brien invited his parents and friends, and Anita asked her parents to come, but they declined. “We cannot leave the hotel, but you are welcome to come here for your honeymoon. We would like to see you both,” was their answer. Brian was happy to accept, he wanted to see those beautiful mountains again. What he didn’t know was that his friends had the same idea. They also wanted to see those mountains again.
Anita and Brian were enjoying their honeymoon, when Brian’s friends showed up, bags full of climbing equipment, ready for an adventure. They were just as surprised to see him as he was surprised to see them. “What’s a surprise,” they all said in unison. It was a nice surprise for Brian, but less so for Anita. She wanted to have Brian for herself, and his friends presented a danger to that wish. As it turned out, her fears were justified.
"What are your plans?" asked Brian when his friends settled down.
“We want to climb …” and they named the mountain Brian was always dreaming of climbing. Just as Anita was the woman of his life, that mountain was a mountain of his desire.
“Take me with you,” he blurted. It wasn’t a conscientious thought; it just came out of his mouth. They looked at him, and then one of them, Roger, said: “What about Anita? Aren’t you here for your honeymoon?”
“The climb takes only six days. She could be by herself for that time.”
His friends didn’t think it was a good idea, but Roger wondered:
“You really want to climb that mountain so much?”
"Yes.”
This was something Roger couldn’t understand. For him climbing a big mountain represented exhaustion, cold and danger. He liked rock climbing on a sunny day but ploughing up the mountain through snow towards a distant summit wasn’t his idea of fun. He joined his friend because he didn’t want to be left out, but secretly he hoped that the big climb would be replaced by more moderate objectives. Now Brian offered him a dignified retreat.
“OK. You can take my place and I will keep Anita company.”
Brian thought it was a generous offer. Now it was up to him to present that offer to his wife.
“Are you telling me you want to leave me alone for six days? On our honeymoon?” Anita was more than unhappy. She was furious.
“It is only six days, and Roger will stay with you. This will be my last big mountain and then we will have all our holidays together.” Brian knew he was making a promise he would not keep.
“I want to spend my honeymoon with my husband,” and Anita walked away.
This put Brian in an awkward position. What should he do? Should he climb the mountain and perhaps lose Anita, or stay with her and lose the mountain? This is a situation no wife of a mountain climber should ever put her husband to face. He might make a wrong choice.
Brian did make a wrong choice, and after a day of frosty silence, he departed with his friends. Roger, who was left behind, was careful not to make Anita even more furious than she was and tried to be very polite. They had dinner together and when they parted to their rooms, Anita grabbed his arm.
“You are supposed to keep me company. Correct?”
“Yes.”
“And how do you plan to do it?”
“By being nice to you.”
“OK, be nice to me. I was hoping to enjoy my honeymoon with my husband, but he is not here, and I need a replacement.”
“Am I the replacement?”
“Yes. A replacement who will be nice to me.”
“And what about Brian? He is my friend.”
“Brian has his fun up on the mountain and I want to have my fun down here.”
Roger couldn’t find any fault in that logic, and for six days he became Brian's replacement. When the boys returned, the greetings were a bit strained.
“Hello, how was it? Did you climb it?” asked Anita.
“Yes, we did. And how about you? How did it go with Roger?”
“It went well.”
They didn't talk about it anymore and the rest of their stay passed smoothly. Then, during the flight home, Anita asked: “So, how did you like our honeymoon?”
“It was exciting,” said Brian, and Anita couldn’t agree more.